Thursday, 1 November 2012

Forever Doesn't Last As Long As It Used To

At a time when the marriage vows explicitly stated: "as long as you both shall live," I remember being at a wedding where the vows ended with "for now."

We looked at each other, shock registering on our faces and think to ourselves, that this marriage was over before it began.

Looking back at that time, this couple stayed together longer than most of the couples who promised "to have and, forwarding to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to death do us part. "

And that was at a time when marriages stayed together forever, if people do not live as long as they do today, when people had jobs from the moment they take their first job until the day she died or retired with a gold watch , and they lived together long enough to see their grandchildren born and married.

Today, for always seems to be to get tired of wedding, from the disappointments, of difficult times. Forever seems to be one of the partners decides that a monogamous marriage is unrealistic.

Our expectations seem to have changed. So many things that used to be "forever" as marriage, now seem a "use-by" date.

I heard a woman say that she thinks that our expectations have changed, because there are so many more opportunities for men and women to cheat. Whereas men used to corner the market on cheating, because he had so much more social interaction than his wife, now that women have a full career and they socialize more in their business interactions, their number increased in the cheating department.

But is that really true? Men and women are always opportunities to cheat. Why else would we have gotten so used to hearing men tell a woman that they were going to bed, "My wife did not understand me?"

Today we hear these same women who supposedly do not understand their man telling a man she wants to have an affair with: "My husband is always at work. He's never home and when he got home, he never paid me or the kids. "

Infidelity has always been part of our society, but never in such large numbers. We must assume that people today are not their husbands love as deep as they used to, or that they are bored with the whole idea of ​​marriage faster than before?

We must assume that if people today do not live so long, they stay with their spouse "till death do us part" like most couples did in generations past?

Have we become jaded by all the distractions in our lives and expect more from our partners than they know how to give or even want to give?

We seem to be much more of a need to be entertained than we ever had in earlier years. Does this ennui infiltrated our relationships so much that we expect our spouses to keep entertaining us and, if they do not, does this authorize an affair once boredom sets in?

Men often talk about their libido being the cause of their infidelity and women talk about no longer feel desirable as the cause of them. Both want to be loved, but now they are looking for it in different places.

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